Everyone Needs To Become A Rapper
This week I came across a Facebook post by a friend from high school. In this post this friend stated how happy he was to officially announce the beginning of his journey to become a rapper. Immediately I clutched my pearls and gasped “a rapper?!”.
I mean yeah, sure enough, we had all dreamed of becoming rappers in our teens. I even recall feeling like the coolest kid at the party when I showed up in my silver G-Unit chain, as if 50 cent had signed me personally. But as the realities of life set in, you begin to realise that maybe the life of spitting hot fire whilst the bones of your defeated enemies are laid at your feet in a crowd of scanty clad women might not be for you.
Maybe you don’t have “dem skills”? In fact, as we all found out, in order to become a successful rapper you need to have more than hot bars. You need a team, quite a large one at that. I’m talking about producers, sound engineers, promoters, agents, brand managers, financiers, groupies, a rap crew or group that you run with and most importantly fans.
This got me thinking, that’s a lot of people just for the success of one person. You know when you think about it, all of those people are sustained for an average of ten years on the back of even the most average rappers.
The industry in itself seems really (technical term) sustainable, with the number of artists continuously growing and diversifying. It was at this point I had the epiphany, what if the government invested into creating Hip-Hop as a viable career path?
Now I know what you’re going to say “But Curtis! There simply will be too many rappers for them all to be successful”. And yes you may be right but think of this, which industry can offer us the numbers that Hip-Hop does?
In my earlier list I counted ten people who are involved in making any given person a successful rapper. Those are ten people who might have found themselves sitting in some stuffy office calling a random person to ask about their insurance. Now that person can sit in the same stuffy office, but now they get to call random people and talk about cool things, like the latest King Yum Time™ album and how much it goes in.
As with all industries a major concern is saturation of the market. However, as has been observable from the evolution of the industry, there can never be too many rappers.
As time progresses, more and more horrible rappers are added to the collection of individuals with actual talent. And similar to the trends seen in the pop music industry, people actually end up liking these rappers, and hence support their careers.
Education is the core of any economic policy. And similarly, there is a way to get the kids in on the fun of being a semi-popular rapper.
The first step is to start training camps in high schools and universities, with classes in Beat making, Lyricism, and Swag. After some time we could begin signing exchange programs with other countries, where the brightest students go on learnerships to prestigious institutions in Compton, USA.
Rap names will be important, and thus all students will be required to choose one on graduation. All rap names will be subject to copyright, therefore I have decided to choose mine first.
Rap Names: A star is born
Now, being a qualified MC in the field my name has taken some time to decide. After some careful thought I have settled on Plenty Gold Chains O.G™. For those not in the know, O.G is the title given to MC’s (fairly new rappers) once they have excelled in the field.
I have already begun hiring in the positions of associate rapper, producer #2, and groupie #5; If you are interested in the position you can email me at email@example.com.
There’s no need to thank me for potentially solving the unemployment crisis, just buy my mixtape and share with friends. I start touring in June. Blah! (My ad-lib)
Solving Economics is a series of essays that attempt to solve the economic issues facing developing states in a globalised, competitive world economy. These solutions aim to be innovative and sustainable in their approach, and are published following extensive research into the topic.